Normal Student unsure if they should acknowledge the STUPOL candidate from ARTS1007 course.

words by the secret subeditor*

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The route to Ingkarni Wardlii from Napier

Throughout their undergraduate degrees, the walk from Napier to Ingkarni Wardlii can be a treacherous trek on a normal day, not to mention during student union election week. This is because there is an increased influx of students on campus; a phenomenon that hasn’t been seen since the start of the semester.

“Yeah, we did a group presentation once and skipped the lecture for Unibar, more than once. Do I still have to give them eye contact?” John Smith vaguely asked whilst avoiding eye contact with On Dit.

Smith is one of the many students on popular social website, Facebook, who has developed fearos facebookous, rendering him incapable of dealing with people in real life. Nowhere is this more evident than when he crosses paths with former group members on the way to his third year tutorials.

“I suppose they’ve actually learnt something from The Enquiring Mind, campaigning on these issues [points to the paper] here for freedom, democracy and what not” he says after mustering up the courage to accept a How To Vote from a ARTS1007 classmate now turned prospective candidate for SRC General Councillor.

He still receives the yearly notifications of birthdays and friendship anniversaries of past group members in ARTS1007. “I did give them a like on their new profile picture last night.”

Smith will be voting in this year’s student elections and plans to delete past group members from Facebook to avoid future STUPOL encounters for the rest of his degree.

More to come…

#UAvotes

*lol jokes we don’t have subeditors

Written by

Adelaide University student magazine since 1932. Edited by Nicholas Birchall, Felix Eldridge, Taylor Fernandez and Larisa Forgac. Email us at onditmag@gmail.com

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